My Safeway Starbucks

I live in Canada, and in my neck of the woods we experienced a big snow dump last week which included an arctic cold front. Wow, it's a good thing my friends, family and I all live in Canada as we had the luxury of waiting for the storm to be over in the comfort of our igloos.

I'm lucky my igloo is surrounded by three Starbucks. Even better news those guys at Starbucks are just finishing another location, so soon I will have four Starbucks to choose from! The best part is I don't even have to take the sled dogs out because the Starbucks people made sure that I could walk to all of them within five minutes. Cool.

My favorite Starbucks is located in my neighborhood Safeway grocery store. I know weird, huh? It doesn't have the comfortable chairs, and you can't choose from a million different pastries because they are just a tiny-rinky-dinky location, but they make the best drinks in the world.

I have deduced a few things about the management of this Starbucks, which is one gentleman by the name of Jeff.

  • He makes great drinks.
  • He is an awesome mentor, because all of the girls make the same great  tasting drinks. It is never a hit and miss there.
  • He seems to only hire girls. I have seen the occasional boy, but they don't seem to last long.
  • He hires a certain 'type' of girl: The 'type' of girl he hires can be classified as: intelligent, sweet, having a good attitude, and  must  have long hair

To his credit and the other staff members long hair or not they never have frown-y faces. I went to a different Starbucks last week. I had to as I was out of town. The woman behind the counter had a bad attitude. She was all up in my grill about how I said my coffee order, she was rolling her eyes at me. It took all I had not to say, 'Am I bothering you? Is this a work for free day?' The coffee tasted crappy, but that is what I get for cheating on Jeff and the girls.

Now I make espresso drinks at home. My guest tell me that they are delicious. I have spent a lot of money on my equipment, and about ten years learning my craft. I can make you a foot of foam if you desire; yeah I am that good.

If I needed to get a job I would think Starbucks would be a perfect fit for me. I love their coffee, they would let me drink it for free, and they would pay me to make it.

I also think I am super qualified to work at a Starbucks if you minus out my crappy stuff that keeps me from going back to work for real. I am smart, super friendly, my husband says I am pretty, I can make you  a kick-ass coffee. Yeah, but what's the point I could never be hired at my favorite location. My dreams of being a 'Super Barista' have gone up in smoke because I have short hair.

I could grow it long, but truth be told I look crappy with long hair.

If I want to be a barista my only option at this time would be to go to the grocery store across the street from Safeway and ask them if I can set up my espresso machine in their store. I would serve up the world's greatest coffee there. I would call a throw down on Jeff that's for sure! I know how to train people too, and  I would only hire smart, sweet, good looking guys with short hair.

However, I got a pretty nice gig sleeping in until nine in the morning, sitting around in my jammies until whenever,and then strolling over to have great coffee at Jeff's Starbucks. They know my friends and I. As soon as they see me coming to the counter they are already making my drink.

It's a sunny day today and I am thinking about going out for coffee, but the truth is today it is just a pipe dream, because I'm anemic. The five minute walk might as well be five hours. Instead I will just give Jeff and the girls a nod and thought, and maybe tomorrow I will well enough to get out there and go and see them.


  1. hi amy,
    glad i found your new blog. i hope to see you writing often. i enjoy your humor and how you make the best out of what life hands you.

  2. ahh! I love it Amy!
    you know we all love you at starbucks, and always look forward to your smiling face!!

  3. I love you too do make the best coffee. But a word to the wise: Don't cut that beautiful hair if you want to stay employed. Naw, I am just giving Jeff a hard time. He is one of the nicest guys you will ever meet, but I don't work for him...